Friday, October 8, 2010

IT STARTED WITH THE LAUNDRY ...


Sunny morning. Turned on washing machine. Had shower, dressed, drank coffee. Hung out laundry. Tripped over Sweet Cicely. Fetched secateurs from garage. Pruned Sweet Cicely.

Noticed Pseudopanax sweeping ground. Snipped at Pseudopanax. Mound of prunings getting messy. Fetched bucket from garage. Filled bucket with prunings. Couldn’t find secateurs. Emptied bucket. Found secateurs at bottom. Re-filled bucket. Large no-name shrub poked me in eye. Nearly lost glasses. Attacked no-name with secateurs. No-name too big. Put secateurs in pocket. Fetched long loppers from garage. No-name no match for loppers.

Spied neighbour’s grapevine snaking across fence. Tried to kill it for years. Hacked through shrubbery to fence. Collected leaves, twigs, spiders in hair and clothes. Slashed at grapevine with loppers. Everything fought back. Even Euphorbia. Sticky white stuff all over face, arms, trousers.

Why didn’t I change before doing all this? Why did I start all this?

Bucket now full. Prunings all over lawn. Fetched rake from garage. Good rake. Has useful hook on top for hanging up in garage. Raked prunings into heaps. Hook also catches on Pseudopanax, no-name, roots, branches, glasses, clothesline. Leaned rake against fence.

Stumbled back and forth carrying rubbish to green bin. Green bin now full. Piled excess against garage wall. More leaves, twigs, clippings, debris all over lawn. Fetched mower from garage. Mowed lawn. Now tiny shreds of leaves, twigs, clippings, debris all over lawn.

Found rake and raked lawn. Saw pittosporum had sprouted a diseased limb. Like acne. Hunted for loppers. Found them under Pseudopanax. Applied to diseased limb. Too thick. Fetched small saw from garage. Sawed off limb. Wiped brow. Rubbed sawdust from eyes.

Returned rake, loppers, bucket, saw, mower to garage. Where secateurs?

Collapsed on sofa on deck. Felt sharp twinge. Found secateurs in pocket. Laundry dry.

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